Unconventional things I do when I am angry… and why I’m angry right now.

Okay, so you know I study when I’m absolutely fuming, but then I thought about this and it seems that all of my outlets of anger are a bit unusual:

  • Cleaning my room, or the bathroom.
  • Studying. This mostly involves reading over and condensing notes at this time of the year. But at least I can now make some sense out of what I ‘learnt ‘ about in school.
  • Learning how to write left handed. I do letters in my right hand lightly for my left hand to trace. I’m still pretty terrible at it.
  • Putting my entire phone’s music library on shuffle mode. 871 tracks (which is about as much as I can fit on a 8GB memory card) mean a playlist that doesn’t get boring when I’m too lazy to change the song. It also means all my tracks get played, because I haven’t listened to some tracks in months.
  • Ignoring my computer. As in, being at home all day yet not touching the thing.

I dug this post out of my drafts because well, frankly, I have not been in the best of spirits lately – this will probably be true all year – so even though this blog is meant to be my happy place, putting on a false smile is somewhat difficult. I will soon return to my perky blog self… Although I can’t promise too much.

A brief explanation as to why I’m mad, though – Mom has just flown out to America after a massive 2 days of planning.
I know – amazing, right?
None of this was discussed with the rest of the family besides my aunt (the one who put my hand-knit in the wash) and it’s made me feel very spiteful and betrayed. I’m not even bothered about she fact that she’s flying halfway around the world (to a country which has just suffered yet another mass shooting due to lack of gun laws); I’m bothered that she didn’t think to discuss it with us. Not until she needed paperwork printed. Even then it was my aunt who broke the news to me, dismissing the issue because it was just a business trip for 10 days.
When she took on this new business venture my attitude was (and still remains) neutral, as in ‘I Don’t Care but Don’t Get Me Involved.’ Except only my printer is working so I felt like I was printing my mom off to America myself, and I cannot help but blame my aunt who started off this entire chain of events in the first place!!

(internal screaming)

I’m amazed I didn’t slap her whilst she lectured my little sister, who spoke up a bit after she interrupted me for the umpteenth time that evening with more paperwork (. ‘I go to work and I’m tired and I’m making sure this goes smoothly and whatnot.’ If you planned this earlier you wouldn’t be this stressed now, would you? Whatever. I at least stuck my fingers up in her direction as she left the room.

(more internal screaming)

This has been a brief explanation…

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